I had one. No, really- I did! I had this week of blogging totally planned out but I guess my brain is all “I give no fucks” about plans.
So we started doing some yoga stretching before bed the other night. (Err, morning for all you daytime folk.) Nothing hardcore and definitely no poses, but I searched “yoga” and this ish came up so I suppose it qualifies. The Internets knows more than I do, so who am I to question? We alternated between deep breathing and laughing at how ridiculous the Yogi giving the instructions sounded. We being Branden and I, keep up now.
The first video we followed along to was super simple. Just some basic stretches, no problem. The second video was for lower back pain and sciatica. Branden deals with sciatic nerve pain thanks to his job, so we thought it would be good for him. Then one of the suggested videos at the end of that one was for upper back pain. Well, I’ve got shit posture which means I have upper back pain. So I though why not?
Human bodies are not designed to do some of the things this woman wanted us to do.
I mean really?! Maybe it’s the fact that I’m fat, or maybe it’s the fact that I’ve broken my back before but hell to the motherfuckin’ no. I tried, I really did. That shit is PAINFUL. I am not made to turn that way, not made to support my upper body on one shoulder and my SKULL. And I really don’t want to smell my own armpit which is exactly what it looks like she’s doing. Not that I don’t wear deodorant, but come on. Ew.
I’ll deal with the upper back pain, OK?